I think my biggest fear in life is living as “just another person”. The thing is, I am just another person to most people. To the thousands of people I walk past and never interact with, those I know who don’t get to know me more than on the surface level and even those ignorant people in my life who don’t have the perspective to think about whether I am just another person or not. However, when I’m talking about “just another person”, I mean it in the perspective of my own perception of myself. I refuse to be average.
Now I’m sure if I was to speak to every single person I ever encountered and got to deep dive into their personality traits, their hobbies, their interests and their daily route, a lot of them would not exist on an “average” level. Modern life means we can explore all sorts of avenues, learning as we please, taking part in various activities, living to different timings to each other. I guess the part I want to focus in on is the decision making process when it comes to the larger life moments. The parts of our lives that really give the story its definition.
Now, a few things I do that I already know put me on the “other people” list are my routine, my health and fitness obsessions, my sleep habits and the way in which I obsess over productivity rather than mindlessly doing very little on social medias etc. However, I want to ensure that I take it all one step further.
One thing about being in the band meant that I was forced into making decisions that others would never have to in regards to the larger life choices. My career for example, my location and how I utilised my time all had to be considered. It is both a blessing and curse that this is no longer a hold on me. A blessing as it means I can make different decisions now, but a curse as I now am anxious that those decisions may lead to me becoming “just another person”.
Luckily for me, I have a strong will and I am not about to let my biggest fear become true. When it comes to the larger decisions in life, I have already got plans in motion for what to do next that are very different to your average “just another person”. Career, location and time utilisation are all very much going to be chosen to fit the “not so average” mould. I’m looking forward to talking about them on the blog.
Anyway, I wanted to get a post out about it for some reason.
This week I have been tired, but today I’m not so tired. Off to the gym anyhow.